RIVERDALE IS BACK, BABY, and the BSG team is back on it again. Well, Mary and Kelli are back, anyway, recapping this trash show until the cows come home.
Riverdale’s 27th chapter is entitled “The Hills Have Eyes.” If we’re to believe that this entire show is actually the novel Jughead is writing, does that mean he’s naming all of his chapters titles after movies? In that case, it’s even more of a gimmick than we thought. Here at BSG, we’ve been referring to this episode by a much different name — Chapter 27: “Sex Weekend.” Feel free to steal that for the second draft of your manuscript, Juggy.
I will readily admit that I am one of those people who loves to watch the Oscars almost as much as I love to talk trash about the Oscars. I’ve heard many like-minded people equate the Oscars to “the Super Bowl for movies,” and after some thought, I can pretty much get on-board with this comparison. Sure, there are some huge differences — the Super Bowl is an event where teams are playing live to win something they actually deserve, whereas the Oscars are an arbitrary set of awards determined by a bunch of rich old white people — but when it comes to the excitement of the viewing experience, the amount of alcohol consumed throughout the ceremony, and the excessive pettiness of my Twitter timeline during the show and in the days to follow, I honestly can’t think of two more similar events.
A week from tonight, the 90th Annual Academy Awards ceremony will air on ABC. Despite the fact that I’ve watched the Oscars every year for as long as I can remember, this will be the first time I officially make my predictions in a public forum (and what could be more public than this, our extremely famous and well-known blog?). I want to do my best to be correct, but I also want to give some love to the films I actually liked, so I’m going to format this post the way a lot of writers do: for each category, I’ll give my official prediction, and then I’ll give the film that would win it if were up to me.
This intro is starting to run about as long as I expect Jimmy Kimmel’s opening monologue will, so let’s get into it, shall we?
Of all the sexual misconduct stories that have come out of Hollywood since the Weinstein debacle, I think I speak for a lot of people when I say that I was most disappointed to read about Aziz Ansari. It’s not just because I think he’s funny and I like his work — it’s because he is a person who has consistently presented himself as an ally to women. He has repeatedly self-identified as a feminist, and he doesn’t just talk the talk; with his success, he’s certainly done his part to boost the careers and voices of the women around him.
Ansari’s willingness to help women tell their stories is a huge part of what makes his alleged behavior so surprising and frustrating. It feels like a personal betrayal to so many of us who have loved his work, who’ve been following and rooting for him all along the way because he’s one of the few male voices we felt we could trust to tell our stories as well as his own. If we can’t trust someone like Aziz to understand consent in its complexity, the road ahead of us is even more difficult than we thought.
In processing my reaction to the story, I’ve been thinking about how to reconsider Ansari’s work with this new context: in particular, Master of None, a show I’ve enjoyed immensely (and one I’m not so sure will ever get that third season after all). When Season 2 first dropped on Netflix, it was met with a flood of praise, but in the weeks following its release, people had some questions: specifically about the viability and likability of Dev’s love interest, Francesca. People were starting to realize that Francesca, as a character, was poorly drawn. Think pieces were written, and ultimately, the general consensus seemed to be that Francesca’s lack of depth was most likely intentional.
At the time, I believed this too. There was no way a writer as intelligent as Ansari would have written such a flat character without an underlying motivation for doing so. Now, of course, I’m not so sure. With what’s come to light, I thought it might be interesting to reexamine Francesca and her romance with Dev — not as a clever statement about modern romance, but as a failure on Ansari’s part to convey (or even grasp) the complexity and nuance of romantic relationships with women.
This week, Riverdale takes on a surprisingly timely topic: the preservation of racist monuments. In Chapter 24: The Wrestler, the annual celebration of Riverdale’s glorified founder prompts Jughead to investigate the town’s history, and his findings shed light on the deeply unsettling truth about the origin of Riverdale.
If a careful consideration of historical whitewashing seems too weighty a topic for Riverdale to focus an entire episode on, don’t worry — with tiny wrestling outfits, a lot of sweat, and a deeply sexual physical confrontation between Archie and Hiram Lodge, this chapter certainly earns its title. Plus, we find out more about Chic’s mysterious occupation! Spoiler alert: it’s pretty much what you thought it would be.
So, without further ado, Kelli and Mary present this week’s edition of the BSG Riverdale Recap!
HELLO RIVERDALE FANS AND HOSTAGES! Have you missed our favorite trash teens over this long winter hiatus? Us too! We missed them so much that Mary completely forgot about last week’s episode and just caught up today. That’s right — if you thought Season 2 of everyone’s favorite CW garbage fire ended with the Christmas special, you were mistaken, because we’re only halfway through. (We’re not crying. You’re crying.)
So, what happens when you put a Serpent in a Riverdale uniform? How badly was Nick St. Clair really injured in that car accident a few episodes back? And what ever happened to that bastard child Alice Cooper put up for adoption? Find the answers to these questions and more in this: our first Riverdale Recap of 2018.
It goes without saying that New York has a lot of bookstores. Living here, I stumble across bookstores I’ve never seen before on a regular basis — and in an age where many people seem convinced that print has gone out of style, that’s a pretty magical feeling.
For the past few months, we’ve been featuring different bookstores in the spirit of encouraging people to shop local. Even with such a vast array of options where I live, I immediately knew what my first pick would be. Greenlight Bookstore has been one of my favorites since I moved here; it’s one of those places I simply can’t walk past without taking a look inside, no matter how recently I’ve been. Maybe it’s the enticement of the books on display in the windows, the quaint green awning over the entrance, or the glow of the hanging circular lights inside, but this place lures me in like it’s the flame and I’m the out-of-control moth who has absolutely no business spending any more of her money on books.
Although Greenlight now has two locations in Brooklyn, for this post I’m going to focus on the original Fort Greene store, which opened in 2007 and has, over the course of a decade, become a staple of its community.
In January of 1994, figure skater Nancy Kerrigan was infamously attacked and injured following a practice session at the U.S. Figure Skating Championship. It was later revealed that the attacker, a man named Shane Stant, was hired by co-conspirators of Kerrigan’s main team competitor, Tonya Harding, with the intent to break Kerrigan’s leg so that she would not be able to compete at that year’s Winter Olympics.
I was three years old in 1994. Growing up, I only knew about the incident in the vaguest of terms, my understanding being that at some point in the early 1990s, one female figure skater attacked another in an attempt to ruin her career. I didn’t know anything about these women, only that one of them was good, and one of them was bad. This is the version of Tonya Harding that history paints: she was a crude, aggressive, and ultimately vindictive woman who did unspeakable things to get ahead. She was the closest thing competitive figure skating had to a villain.
When I was home for the holidays last month, my mom and I saw a trailer for I, Tonya, Craig Gillespie’s biopic chronicling Tonya Harding’s life. “I don’t know why anyone would want to watch a movie about that,” my mom said. “I was watching when that happened. The sound of Nancy Kerrigan crying — it was so horrible. I can still hear it.”
Here’s the thing: I, Tonya isn’t about “that.” It’s not about the attack on Nancy Kerrigan, an event which solidified Harding’s reputation as the bad girl of figure skating and ultimately ended her career. No — this film is a biopic in the most traditional sense, no matter how untraditional its methods may be. This is a film about Tonya Harding.
2017 is drawing to a close, which means it's almost January, and almost time for the The Bachelor. The Squad has always approached The Bachelor franchise with varying levels of enthusiasm (meaning everyone is enthusiastic except for Kelli), but the 22nd season is a special kind of bummer, as it's centered around less-than-ideal Bachelor Arie Luyendyk Junior. Come January 1st, we will be subject to approximately four hundred hours worth of some white dude's legendary make-out skills. Now is the winter of our discontent. Full stop.
Though we're disappointed in The Bachelor himself, we have reached a stage of acceptance (you can read Susan's blog post about the process here). Anyway, Arie's not so important — the Squad is all about girl power, and we're still excited to watch 29 women forge long-lasting friendships and drink lots of free alcohol. The cast of the 2018 season has been revealed, and we're here to offer our first impressions. Check them out after the cut.
This past week, Riverdale gave us its first ever Christmas episode. I want you to think about this for a second: this entire show started at the beginning of the Riverdale school year. That means that everything we’ve seen since the very first episode of this show has taken place over the course of less than five months. Just soak that in.
Silent Night, Deadly Night is not just a Christmas episode, but it’s also the mid-season finale (which means that we’re only halfway through this shit, people). Because it’s the last episode for a couple of weeks, a LOT went down, but don’t worry — I’m here to outline every stupid detail for you.
Sadly, Mary was not able to join in on this particular adventure, so this week the thoughts and hot takes are all mine. That being said, please enjoy this very special and very long Christmas edition of the BSG Riverdale recap.
On this past week’s episode, "Tales from the Darkside," Riverdale plays with a new format inspired, we can only assume, by the 1980s horror series of the same name. Admittedly, I hadn’t heard of Tales from the Darkside before I googled it today, but a Twilight Zone-esque anthology series created by none other than George A. Romero seems more than worthy of checking out. In fact, it might even be a better show than Riverdale.
Okay, it’s most likely a better show than Riverdale, but… we’re still here.
The episode opens with a static title card informing us that what we’re about to witness is a retelling of the “tragic events that befell the town of Riverdale,” and without further ado, we’re dropped into the action. Join us, won’t you, for our recap of these… TALES FROM THE DARKSIDE.
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The authors of this blog are four women with opinions about pop culture. That's all you really need to know.