Final Girls by Riley Sager is a new release horror/thriller/mystery novel, and it's basically a slasher movie in book form. So of course Kelli and Emily were fully on board to read and review this book, especially because Halloween exists, and it's today. So Happy Halloween, Book Squad Goalies! Read on for our thoughts on this here book.
Kelli: So, for spooky reasons, we thought it would be fun to read some horror fiction this month and have a little chat with each other about it. Emily, you suggested the book Final Girls by Riley Sager - a book which boasts praise from the one and only Stephen King on its cover.
Emily: Yeah but I feel like those are a dime a dozen really. Stephen King has a lot to say about a lot of people.
Kelli: Where does he find the time to do so much reading?
Emily: He is a speed reader and writer.
Kelli: I want that.
Emily: Same. Though I read this book in two days, so maybe I'm on my way.
Kelli: Anyway, Final Girls follows Quincy, a woman who is the lone survivor of a brutal attack on her group of college friends at a cabin in the woods. The book takes place... ten years after that? I think?
Emily: Something like that, yes.
Kelli: The concept is that there are three different women - Quincy, Lisa, and Sam - who all survived similar attacks roughly ten years apart from one another, and the three of them have been labeled 'the Final Girls' by the news media, based on the horror trope we all know and love. I have a hard time believing the news media would actually employ film trope terminology, but whatever.
Emily: Also the author doesn't do a very good job of crediting Carol J. Clover, the person who came up with the trope. Or explaining what the trope is really about, which was disappointing for me because I'm a theory nerd. I'm just here to trash this novel. I'm sorry if I'm jumping the gun.
Kelli: Yeah. And we're both familiar with it, but I'm sure a lot of the people reading this book aren't.
Emily: So you wrote a paper about the Final Girls trope, which makes you an expert.
Kelli: Yes, I'm an expert. Definitely.
Emily: So for people who don't know what it is, would you care to briefly give us a run down?
“The Watcher in the Woods” is the third episode of Riverdale’s second season, and with sex jogging, poorly-named rival gangs, and even more jingle jangle, things in our favorite trash-fire of a town are only getting more trash-fire-y. This week, due to Halloween-related scheduling conflicts, Kelli and Mary skip their usual chat format and instead bring you a recap in two parts, with Mary’s take on the first half of the episode and Kelli’s on the second.
We’ve got a lot to cover, so buckle up, people — and make sure to grab your baseball bat.
I have one word for this episode: FINALLY. Yes, finally Clinton and Uche are being sent into the Truth Booth after weeks of torturous speculation and anticipation. But more importantly, finally we're getting an episode in its NORMAL format. We start this episode with a challenge, then we go on a date, then we get the Truth Booth, and then finally we end with a Match-Up Ceremony. This is the moment I've been waiting for. I am a person who appreciates structure. Thank you, MTV, for giving me what I so desperately needed for this, the first normal episode of the season. It only took you six tries, but here we are.
So without further ado... let's break down what happened on this week's episode of the greatest show on television.
Aww yeah. It's the Lingerie Party episode. So, it's not that the Lingerie Party is an official thing that Are You the One does every season, but there's definitely at least one episode where these fools get almost completely naked and hook up with random people. Yes, okay, I know what you're thinking, Emily, isn't that kinda the premise of the whole show? And, okay, yes, touché, you are technically correct, but parties like this are where we get a lot of concentrated drama.
So let's dig into it, shall we?
The second episode of Riverdale's second season was, as expected, completely ridiculous, and Kelli and Mary are back this week to break things down for you moment by moment. From Betty's confusing 'Retro Night' benefit to the newest craze sweeping Riverdale High (a drug which, we shit you not, is called JINGLE JANGLE), we've got you covered.
Let's jump right in, shall we?
If you’re like me, you’ve had in-depth conversations with your friends about Serial’s Adnan Syed. You’ve dug into theories about his innocence, listened to new evidence about the cell phone records, and decided who could have really killed Hae Min Lee. You’ve watched Making a Murderer (probably in one weekend) and were left feeling torn about Steven Avery’s role in Teresa Halbach’s murder. You’ve raised your voice in polite conversation about how Avery didn’t get a fair trial.
Serial podcast and Netflix’s Making a Murderer are just two of the true-crime docs that grabbed our attention in the past few years. They turned the casual podcast listener into an Internet sleuth, and the weekend Netflix viewer into an insatiable binge-watcher. Even if you were fully engrossed in these hard-hitting true-crime stories, Netflix now has a mockumentary that will do the exact same thing to you, except it’s a mystery about who spray-painted 27 dicks on 27 cars in a high-school faculty lot. The moment you finish reading this, you should go watch American Vandal. Here’s why, with no spoilers.
It’s not a secret that Emily and I love Grady Hendrix. While I was dogsitting last fall, Emily suggested I read My Best Friend's Exorcism. Though I had lots of work to do, I plowed through the novel with a faithful pug by my side (Frederick the pug has been featured on our Instagram, for reference). I couldn’t put My Best Friend's Exorcism down, like I was cursed to bear witness to the gruesome story of demons, high school, and friendship. The book horrified me for reasons I won’t write here (because it would ruin your own enjoyment when you inevitably read it!), but trust that I loved it. Hendrix employs a type of humor that balances his use of horror.
Hendrix’s new book, Paperbacks from Hell, does something different than My Best Friend’s Exorcism and Horrorstor--both of which we’ve discussed on the blog and podcast before. Paperbacks from Hell is a nonfiction look at the history of horror novel covers, which leads to an examination of the trends in horror fiction.
The CW’s Riverdale is a show that really shouldn’t work. A ‘dark’ adaptation of the Archie comic universe, Riverdale is what happens when you take what is fairly wholesome source material and twist it into a murder mystery, throwing in sex, drugs, gangs, and a lot of awkward red hair-dye while you’re at it. The result is a cross between Gossip Girl and Twin Peaks… with the scale tipping heavily in favor of Gossip Girl.
If you’re not too familiar with the show, check out Mary’s blog post from a few months back about why Riverdale — and the Archie universe in general — deserves your time. Then, come right back here and join Mary and Kelli for their first ever WEEKLY RECAP of RIVERDALE! (Yes, we are actually doing this. Sorry.)
This week marked the premiere of Riverdale’s second season, which promises to be, as Chris Harrison of the Bachelor franchise would say, the most DRAMATIC season yet. We’ve got gunshot wounds! We’ve got a pointless flash forward framing device! We’ve got sexy blood showers! And that’s only in the first ten minutes.
It goes without saying that there WILL be spoilers after the cut.
Wednesdays are extremely long for me. I'm in class until 9:30pm, and by the time I get home, I want to curl up in a ball with my cat and my favorite blanket and never leave the house again. Are You the One is my favorite blanket, guys. It's the thing that brings me peace during times of stress and exhaustion. This show is here for me when I need it, comforting me at the end of the longest day of the week, providing me with a steady supply of joy every time I come to it, and bringing out the Truth-or-Dare-related drama just when things are getting a little too predictable.
What, your blanket doesn't play Truth or Dare with you? Girl, you need a new blanket.
Have you heard the news? Arie Luyendyk Jr. is our next Bachelor.
Come January 2018, we'll all be following Arie of Emily Maynard's season as he quests for love. Bachelor fans are underwhelmed. They're disappointed. They're going through the five stages of grief as the reality of this dissatisfying bachelor pick sinks in.
About the Blog
The authors of this blog are four women with opinions about pop culture. That's all you really need to know.